Thursday, March 22, 2007

Deeper into Voltronese

I have had no proper sleep since Tuesday night, so the prophesies are coming easily today.

Once Voltronese has become the universal language and has drastically reduced the variety of souls on the planet, we will see various splinter groups appear.

Youths, responding to ever-faster development in technology and online virtual reality games, will introduce new slang terms at a rate that terrifies the original Voltron generation. Reactionary organisations called things like the Society for the Protection of Proper Voltronese (or, in Voltronese, the Puretalk Voltron Massiv) will be formed, demanding that all lingo should be limited to the official Voltron Grammar and Vocabulary as laid down in the ultimate authority, Wikipedia. These organisations will sprout terrorist extremes.

Scientific leaps will mean that everybody is medically immortal, so age ceases to be a factor. National and religious boundaries will have evaporated as globalisation, reinforced by the dominance of the Voltronese tongue, turns the world into a monoculture. The only thing that divides people will be the strictness of their adherence to the Wikipedia Voltronese. The Third World War will be fought over whether Shakespeare was the original Voltron.

In the rubble of the nuclear aftermath, rambling survivors will discover tiny clandestine pockets of rudimentary civilisation. Here, crude aboriginal languages are still spoken. Welsh, for example.

6 comments:

Duck said...

official Voltron Grammar and Vocabulary

Hah! And you said Voltronese would spread without the need for a Commisariat. I've unmasked you, comarede! This is your ticket to world domination.

Count me among the anti-Voltron resistance. Long live Babel!

Adelephant said...

I think Voltronese would have three fathers: Chaucer, Tupac Shakur and whoeva invented txt typing, innit. Wouldn't the war be over the preservation of vowels?

Mike Beversluis said...

We kept it straight.
It's all there.
Everything marked,
everything 'membered.
You wait, you'll see.
This you knows.
I be First Tracker.
Times past count I done the Tell.
But it weren't me that tumbled Walker.
It was Savannah.
So it's only right that she take the Tell.

This ain't one body's story.
It's the story of us all.
We got it mouth-to-mouth.
You got to listen it and 'member.
'Cause what you hears today
you got to tell the birthed tomorrow.
I'm looking behind us now.
across the count of time
down the long haul,
into history back.
I sees the end what were the start.
Cause Voltron Got Served.

Duck said...

super top poem Beaver lice. make many bomb explode with words shizzle cool. Voltron rule with fantascic groovy power, run over dead with thousand cat likeness lazy poems with no sound alike.

Mike Beversluis said...

Dookie, it ain't mine.

Duck said...

much sorry Mr Mike. no express english fantastic learn from Voltron show no bad meaning :-) Brit make Voltron world teacher speaking for everyone only language. not bread in oven long enough thought, try say goody words of praise but get run over nose with curled up hands no understand goody praise, think I badding them. Go back to mother mouth, no more laffe at Dookie.