You may recall that I greet Tuesday’s inevitable arrival with no great affection. A post-Bank Holiday Tuesday, in dank blustery rain, and in the middle of what Nige would term a ‘workstorm’ ought therefore to biff my spirits something rotten. Oh well at least it’s a short week everyone will say, but in fact it is well known that four day weeks last longer than ordinary five day ones.
However, I have kept my pecker up on this Mega-Tuesday by recalling a terrific expression uttered to me at the weekend by a northern in-law. “She took me outside and bollocked me from arsehole to breakfast time,” he said, in a broad Lancs accent which you should mimic for the full effect.