Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Mega-Tuesday; and a fine expression

You may recall that I greet Tuesday’s inevitable arrival with no great affection. A post-Bank Holiday Tuesday, in dank blustery rain, and in the middle of what Nige would term a ‘workstorm’ ought therefore to biff my spirits something rotten. Oh well at least it’s a short week everyone will say, but in fact it is well known that four day weeks last longer than ordinary five day ones.

However, I have kept my pecker up on this Mega-Tuesday by recalling a terrific expression uttered to me at the weekend by a northern in-law. “She took me outside and bollocked me from arsehole to breakfast time,” he said, in a broad Lancs accent which you should mimic for the full effect.

10 comments:

worm said...

You just did a northern swear on your own blog. shame on you.

Brit said...

I suppose I have a policy like the Times rather than the Guardian.

malty said...

Ah yes, the language of the north, describing a spade as a spade. 'It's out of tolerance', 'by how much', 'oh about a midge's dick.'
How did they know that. Had someone actually gone and measured one? if so, with what, a micrometer perhaps, the indignant midge, sitting there wondering what the...

Later of course with metrication the eponymous midges willy became 0,1 of a millimetre.

Respecting this bloggers golden rule we will not even mention the badgers bum, as in as rough as.

Chris said...

Camp southern curse overheard on sunday morning as the Brighton train pulled away, leaving our hero on the platform: "Oh my ACTUAL God!"

Love it

Brit said...

Superb, Chris.

Brit said...

And Malty.

Gaw said...

I like how she bollocked him across the space-time continuum. Very thorough.

David said...

Ah, so to my list of ways a common language divides us I must now add "kept my pecker up," which I hope to God means something different in English than it would mean in American.

Brit said...

Yes, that impressed me too, Gaw.

David - pecker officially means nose/mouth in this instance, but the expression is given a nudge-nudge frisson because everyone knows the US slang meaning.

David said...

Now I'm trying to combine "knocked you up" with "kept my pecker up" in a sentence that would mean something along the lines of, "yes, I am happy to see you. Why do you ask?"

But it's just not coming.