In addition to having a magnificent proboscis, Marina Hyde is the closest thing that British hackery has to a Queen of Snark. Read her here on Lindsay Lohan’s incarceration. Hyde manufactures a lot of good verbiage out of the world’s trivial nonsensicalities. Perhaps she's wasting her talents. But then again, who isn't?
Her only serious rival for well-made snarkiness is probably Caitlin Moran, now hidden behind The Times’ paywall (anyone bought into that yet?). But Moran is, like her face, softer and a bit squishier than Marina Hyde, whose prose is as sharp as her nose.
And if you think this comparing of the columnists’ looks and writing styles is irrelevant and sexist since nobody worries about the physiognomies of male journalists, I’d just like to point out that Rod Liddle is sloppy and provocative in a tired sort of way, and Peter Hitchens is frightening, a bit twisted and clearly the less successful younger brother of Christopher.
Simon Heffer must have one of the best matches of looks and content.
ReplyDelete...and name?
ReplyDeleteTalking of which, I was going to work something up about a nice version of Hyde called Marina Jekyll but I got bored with it.
ReplyDeleteI nominate Marjorie Proops, leader of the pack, you can't be a proper journoburd unless you smoke like a chimney. Spent a lot of time on TV talking absolute twaddle but there again, who doesn't.
ReplyDeleteHer beak was well, kinda, you know, of the type that gives away your religion.
Am I the only one who couldn't give a toss whether or not Lohan draws breath.
How about Melanie Phillips? Uncompromising but obviously unhinged?
ReplyDeleteI'm rather of the school "if you want to depress yourself, read a newspaper", so I'll admit I avoid Melanie Philips who is the page-turner's page-turner. The one I usually try to read is Minette Marrin, a goddess but a severe one, though I suppose I won't be reading anything more by her while the Paywall o' Death is running. There are some good writers on the Telegraph, imho, but the foaming man-calf of Toryshire isn't among them. Masterly understatement, saying that Peter Hitchens is "a bit" twisted. Oh well, that's several reps down the tubes; I wonder what else today will bring.
ReplyDeleteThat LiLo piece is brilliant.
ReplyDeleteAnd you've gotta love Mel P (or is that just me?)
I can't think why there are never any byline pics of Jan Morris, the way that girl writes makes her sound like a real hottie
ReplyDeleteWho's the more successful younger brother of Christopher?
ReplyDeleteI do like that woman who writes those big juicy pieces on the third page of the Sun.
ReplyDeleteNige, I don't think about the Mid-East much so Mel P went beyond the pale for me with her unhingedness re the MMR vaccine. She's still defending that charlatan who recently got struck off. In this respect (and I'm in sure others) she's a danger to the public.
ReplyDeleteNot a word nor a snigger for herself, Regina d'Printedworda, the majestic Polly T, cycling legend, columnist (fifth of course) extraordinaire. Boy does dat dame have opinions.
ReplyDeletePeter Hitchens is perfectly sane, apart from his loathing for all 20th Century music, and his eyebrows. His tussles with the cops, Blair, and all that is evil, deserve applause. His fatter brother is the celebrity, it´s true.
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