JPFC Westwood versus America

The mighty Mike Nelson links to the John Portsmouth Football Club Westwood horrorpost, sending over a swarm of bemused Americans to gawp at the freak.

This is the second time that Rifftrax has linked to Think of England, thus instantly (and briefly) increasing its hit rate by an order of magnitude. The other time was to that story about the bacon.

I feel a certain responsibility here, as an ambassador for Britain. I don’t want to create the impression that Britain is just all lunatic soccer fans and bacon butties. Admittedly, lunatic soccer fans and bacon butties do make up a good part of it, but we also have other stuff here, such as Nectar points, Basil Brush, Dame Judi Dench and lots of mostly crap pop music.

Better get used to it, too, America. If Gordon Brown doesn’t throw in the towel in the next few weeks, we’ll all be coming over to live with you and Obama.

We will all cram aboard an enormous fore-and-aft rigged three-mast barque, Jamie Oliver in the galley, Sir Ian McKellan in the crow’s nest, Stephen Fry at the mizzen and John Portsmouth Football Club Westwood as the furious figurehead, ringing his bell and shrieking: “The British are coming! The British are coming!”